This Natural Hair Thing

So…… For the last few weeks the Natural Community has been up in arms about who’s considered “natural”. Are white women natural or is it just a black thing, is one considered natural if they have never had a relaxer or is it only when one has transitioned and/or done the big chop?

Well depending on who you are some of these things will qualify a well as disqualify me from #TeamNatural, I consider myself natural all the way. I have been rocking my afro/afro puff for over 10 years now, but I never had a relaxer! However, my hair is thick as ever, some parts in tight coils while other some parts are super curly. My question is if it grew out of my head like this in its natural state then isn’t that my natural hair? I rock wash n go’s, twist outs, afros, Bantu knots and more but because I didn’t go through these unspoken rights of passage then I’m not natural? Really 😏

True story before the Natural Hair Movement took off some years ago I decided to go into a shop and get my hair done. I was a walk in and when a stylist was assigned to me she came to the waiting area to escort me to her chair. I was excited wanting to see what she could do to tame this mane of mine. But as I sat I the chair I looked into the face of the stylist and I could tell SHE WAS NOT READY! She said ummmmm do you have a relaxer. Nope, I replied can’t stand the smell. She walked behind me, stood there for a moment and then removed my cape. I can’t… I don’t know what to do to your hair to tame it other than relax it. Wow my mind was blown, but I thanked her for not wasting my time, went home and pulled this stuff up into a ponytail. Really 😏

Fast ward to not even a year ago. I went to a “natural hair salon” to have my hair done for my Bridal Shower. The stylist took me to her chair, gave me a “hair consult” and began my process. Guess what???? Waste of my time. I looked like Raggedy Ann with curl created using brown gel and flexirods. She saw the look on my face and said well your hair is too fine for natural styles, you should cut it all off and start again. Ummmmmm…. Really 😏

I have cut my hair several times in my life and guess what? It grows back this exact same way because it my natural hair texture. So why can’t my texture be just as celebrated as others? Oh because I’m more 3C than 4C? Why must we always find a way to create a division, some sort of drama and be so against one another? I think that this whole hair typing thing is just as disrespectful as saying “she’s cute for a dark skinned girl”, no fool she’s just cute, you understand where I’m coming from?

I am more than my hair, but my hair is a part of me. And furthermore I was born with this pattern so it’s my natural hair. To me, I’m the definition of natural! The reason why women decide to do the big chop is to achieve what I was blessed with naturally. I’m not throwing shade, I’m just telling my story the best way that I know how. When it’s all said and done I love the #TeamNatural community but I don’t need it to validate my tresses.

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5 thoughts on “This Natural Hair Thing

  1. Thanks for sharing. Beautiful hair. It definitely doesn’t look hard to manage…so it’s a shame so many people don’t know what to do with it. Welcome to my life. That sad reality just speaks to the fact that unfortunately hairdressers aren’t use to dealing with natural hair (whether that be because it’s so rare, or bc naturalistas don’t frequent hair salons often). Who knows. Anywho, I totally agree with you that natural is simply whatever you were born with. I don’t think there is a ‘right of passage’ to be considered a naturalista. I know many women who never relaxed their hair, as I know many who did and have done many different things to their hair. That doesn’t make them any more or less natural. Hair typing is simply to just allow ppl to relate to you. Our hair is versatile. We style it different ways so sometimes it’s hard to tell if someone’s hair is like yours or not. Reality is that certain products and methods work better on a certain type of hair, so the only use for that is…I’d rather follow someone that has my type of hair, then follow a while lady that has straight hair and can get away with a lot less care then I’d have to put into my coily tresses.

    The thing is that now the term “natural” has been coined to mean more than the texture of your hair. It can be seen as a “struggle”, physically, and mentally. The difference I think with white people trying to jump on this bandwagon is a lot more than just the texture of the hair, it’s the mental issues with natural hair that they will never be able to truly understand. I have no problem with them calling themselves natural. If they’re keeping their hair as it naturally is, that is what they are. No problem. The issue that I think the natural hair community has with them is that white people want to jump in our discussion about our hair. I just don’t get why they don’t just start their own medium, as we did, unless their hair truly does favour the kinkiness of most black peoples hair, or they need advice on how to deal with their mixed children’s hair…I just don’t get why they feel the need to impede.

    • Thanks for your feed back my beautiful naturalista. I agree about the impeding, black women and white women can not discuss natural hair on any level. It’s two totally different things, they just don’t mess. As far as the hair typing goes though I am 3C/4A I’ve learned some of my best techniques from ladies on YouTube that are 4C and on the reverse tried some things that I learned from women with hair type similar to mine and the experience was a major FAIL lol! I just don’t like the drama of the division, the bickering back and forth and the disrespect that I’ve seen on several social media sites and groups. Let’s just love and support one another.

      • Agreed!!! There are many things I’ve learned from other women who don’t have hair like mine, what I should have said maybe is expectations. I can’t style my hair like someone who’s hair is totally unlike mine then be confused as to why it hasn’t turned out the same way. Texture usually matters in this respect. Totally agree that there should be no bickering bc of it…. That’s just juvenile. We are all beautifully made. Can’t wait for everyone to truly see that… and embrace it!

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