Tag Archive | relatives

Related DOES NOT mean friends

I know I know I know…. family is all you have right? WRONG! A lot of the time family can be your worst enemy. They can cut you down, kick you when you hit the bottom, and shovel the dirt on you even though they see you're still breathing.

I was watching Iyanla Vanzant's show on YouTube and she talked about family being forever relationships, the relationships that you will never, no matter what be able to end. And guess what folks? She is so right, you can't end it but oh you can separate from it.

With that being said what you have to learn to do is love from a distance. You don't have to go to every family gathering, cookout, or get together. And think about how much fun is it really to go somewhere out of obligation. That doesn't mean that you don't love your family it just means you're not friends. There is no secret treaty that says you have that you must be around those that you're related to simply because you're related. You are not required to sit in the negativity of others and allow that mess to seep into your pores. And even if you end up going, if the atmosphere becomes too heavy for your positive vibes it is okay to get up and get gone. You're grown you don't owe anyone any explanation.

There is a saying that I use to this day… "blood only makes you related it does not make you family". In life you figure out the difference between relatives and family. Hell I'm not even related to the majority of my family.

We Are Simply Related

You know how the old saying goes, something like… blood is thicker than water. So please explain to me how that same blood that bonds us stops a man from being a father to his daughter.

Is that thin water the reason that my tears are invisible? And why is it when it’s my turn to talk my message is so undeliverable?

I understand you were and are the best you that you know how to be. But how dare you get upset when all that I’m doing is being me.

You hurt me more than you will ever know and you are my mother… Father… Sister… Brother… Yet you fail to understand that titles won’t ever make us closer to one another.

And yes I love and I forgive you but I choose to stay away. Not because I’m holding on but because you really haven’t changed and things are always your way or no way.

As a child I had no choice but to take it, to live the way we lived. But as a woman I have the option to decide to what and to whom the energy that I give.

Family doesn’t do something for you and then have to tell everyone they did it. Family doesn’t beg you to tell your deepest darkest secret then run with it and expose it.

Drama is always the dish of the day no matter the time or the place. Talking about me behind my back and jumping all up in my face.

Then you have the audacity to get mad when I defend myself. Do you think I’m going to continue to allow you to deplete my mental and emotional wealth?

Nope not at all and not even with a heavy heart. I have friends bound to me by love that have fulfilled the family part.

So while you think that blood makes of us family and I just have to accept and take it. In my mind all that blood does is simply make us related.